Pet Peeves

Today is Easter! Yay! Although I should be happy and celebrating right now, I stumbled upon something on You Tube that really bothers me. I was watching a bboy battle and I stumbled upon a comment by some dude saying :

"Good day to all of my fellow Christians, firstly my apology for being out of topic. I came here to remind you people that the judgment day has been starting already. I urge you my fellow Christians to depart from all form of unchristian conduct lest you be found not worthy to inter the kingdom of God in the Day of Execution. Please do not misinterpret my activity as spam; I did not do it for that purpose."-conceil8

This is truly one of my biggest pet peeve. As much as I want to support tche guy because he probably had good intentions, his methods are something I completely disagree with. I respect the fact that he is trying to evangelize others and share his faith, but using fear as his tactic? That is complete BS. This guy is as bad as those people who come onto campus shouting that we are all going to go to Hell. I took the liberty to go to his website read what he has to say about what we should do so that we can enter the Kingdom of God and it is absolutely ridiculous. He suggests that we literally give up everything and submit ourselves to a totalitarian-like system with this thing called the "Administration" controlling every aspect of lives and what we do. It's unbelievable that this guy believes that this is the path to salvation. People like them give Christians a bad rep. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if they create more non-believers than believers which is very depressing.

I respect everyone who is brave enough to voice their opinions. Yet, I just can't help but feel extremely frustrated with people who post up or say stupid crap like the guy did above. He didn't even bother to say why he believed that Judgment Day has started already. Plus, (correct me if I'm wrong) I'm pretty sure that the Tribulation happens before Judgment Day, so this pretty much makes his belief that Judgment Day is upon us invalid. I can't believe that people are this stubborn. It's almost like they believe that they are the only one in the world with the right opinion and everyone else is wrong. Why do they want to be the only correct voice in the world? It just doesn't make any sense to me. It also pisses me off that some Christians would go as far as taking certain Bible verses out of context so it would help their arguments or provide a reason for certain things that they do. The act of perverting a Bible verse so it will justify your argument or your actions is truly an act of selfishness and adds fuel to the fire for those who want to argue that Christians are hypocrites.

I believe that the best way to try and get someone to understand my faith is by being their friend first. I feel that sometimes it is easier to share my faith with someone who is my friend than walking up to a complete stranger and sharing my faith with them. Perhaps the one thing that needs to be recognized among many Christians is that the strategies of the past are often not the most effective methods and we need to adapt to today's culture and adjust our methods. It's like the guitar being used in modern worship. Back in the days, the guitar was often associated with rock music which was considered by the church "Devil music" and it was considered absurd to use it for worship. However, if we look at most churches today it is hard not to find a guitar being used for worship. The usage of the guitar is just an adaptation by musicians who realized that the instrument could be utilized to make some amazing music for worship and that music can be used to appeal to a broader audience.

Learning is Fun

This Spring quarter is showing a lot of promise. If you haven't found out by now, I'm no longer a Bio major, or will no longer be a bio major by the end of this quarter. Instead I will, hopefully, graduate UCI as a Public Health Policy major. The switch from a science major to something that is non-science is a scary switch for me because I am now removing myself from world and placing myself into another world. Growing up, one of the things that I always wanted to do as a kid was become a scientist. I had so many aspirations back then. I wanted to cure cancer, make some sort of potion that will make people feel young all the time, etc. I pretty much wanted to make the world a happier place. Then I got older and reality sort of kicked me in the face. I still have the desire to grow up and help people, but I just have to find another way to do it.

During spring break I realized that I was in the wrong major and pretty wasted the first two years of my college career trying to be successful in a major that was simply not suited for me. I tried my hardest every quarter, spending a ridiculous amount of time trying to expand my knowledge of biology only to receive grades that did not justify the amount of effort and time I spent. After realizing that I was never good at biology and seeing that my current path is not going to take to where I want to go, I opted to switch my major to something that I might have a chance at and it will hopefully refuel my desire to study again. I never thought studying was a bad thing because in the end I'm learning something new. Whether I'm learning about business, laws, or whatever I am studying, I used to enjoy the process of gaining new knowledge. I can't say that there has never been a time when I wished I was doing something else other than studying but looking back at all my study sessions, I used to never have a problem with the idea of studying until college.

I'm hoping that my switch of major that it will allow me to enjoy my last couple years at UCI and raise my GPA back from the dead. As for now, enjoy my last couple weeks as a second year and just remember to take some time to sniff the roses/whatever plant smells nice in Aldrich park and prepare for the future. (Namely getting ready to study abroad, so pretty much getting ready for that culture shock. :D)

Why I Love SPOP

Oh how I love spring break. It is just a wonderful time; great weather, no school related stress, and time to see old faces. It really is one of the best seasons of the year. That said, this spring break has also had it's share of being somewhat mentally tiring.

One thing that sparked one of my many trains of thoughts was something that I read in one of my friend's blog. His dad was undergoing surgery for the same exact thing my grandpa had. From what I read so far, it seems like his father is doing fine and I'm glad to hear that.

I think my grandpa plays a large role why I hold SPOP so close to my heart. The year I went to SPOP was the same year that my grandpa passed away. SPOP was one of the greatest experiences of my life. My staffers were the best staffers in the world and have impacted me in so many ways that I cannot express in words. The biggest reason why I wanted to be a staffer was to emulate them and impact so many others the way they impacted me. Now looking back at SPOP after this previous year and after reading my friend's blog, I really believe the reason why I love SPOP so much is because it created an alternate reality for me to escape to.

My folks planned for me to attend SPOP the weekend before my grandpa's funeral. The way they set it up was, I attend SPOP for three days and right after it ends I go to the airport and was flown out Sacramento for the funeral. I can still remember my parents dropping me off at Mesa court, telling me to make sure I leave as soon as possible so I won't miss my flight. It was hard going to some orientation for a college that I didn't want to go to and knowing that right after I had to say goodbye to someone I love. Yet, my staffers have accomplished the impossible and lifted my spirits in a way that many others couldn't. They helped me escape the harshness of reality long enough for me to finally accept the fact that he is gone, but I will someday be reunited with him. For the first time I cried not because I was mad or sad, but because I was happy. It was then and there I fully understood what tears of joy were. I never had the chance to tell them how grateful I was for them being there and just providing a friendly atmosphere. Even when I staffed with one of my own staffer, I was still never able to tell her how thankful I was. So I want to thank my staffers now (Larry, Lilly, Chris, Donald, J-Chou, and Erin) for helping me smile during a period of my life where it was hard to.

Success and Failures (Part 2)

In continuation with my earlier post, I stumbled upon a great clip from Rocky (I think it's from the sixth movie.I lost track after Rocky 3). Rocky pretty much sums up what I wanted to say, so enjoy the clip.

Success and Failure

The future is a scary thing. In fact, every time I'm asked the question "What are you planning to do post-college?" I can only say that I'm planning on going to grad school but the key word there is "planning." I think that word scares me, it is synonymous with "never guaranteed." You can control certain things leading up to something you want in the future but after that it's all up to fate to see where you will end up. However, all those countless hours of preparation and careful planning can be unraveled by a single, cruel twist of fate. It's like watching a model airplane that you just finished accidentally get stepped on by your little brother. You dedicate so much time to every little details, perfecting each and every part. It was perfect in every aspect. A symbol of your hard work and patience. Yet, you could not avoid the tragedy of it being destroyed. Moments like these often lead us to question why things like this happens. It's too unfair. It only leads to sadness, confusion, and anger.

Despite the fact that fate can be cruel, I think it is very important that we realize that when one door closes, several others swing wide open. The problem is that our gaze too fixed upon that single closed door that we fail to notice the other doors that are open. One of the biggest inspiration stories of my life is the life story of my dad. He went to UCI (like me!) for undergraduate school where he excelled in most of his classes. He was an aspiring pre-med student who is the son of a renowned heart surgeon from a small town in Sacramento. His parents pushed him to become a doctor and he openly accepted the challenges, preparing his entire life to become a doctor and only a doctor. Fourth year of college swings by and he scored decently on his MCAT, had an impressive GPA, an equally impressive resume, and an abundance of volunteer and research hours. He applied to 30-something medical schools. He received 30-something rejection letters. He was confused at first as to why he didn't receive a single acceptance letter, but then he decided move forward and see what other options he had available. He was accepted to UCLA's public health graduate program and he then went to work for the FDA until he resigned from the FDA and started his own pharmaceutical consulting business. Now he just as successful, if not more, as a doctor and he still is working in the medical field doing the things that he loves.

Stories like those are inspirational to me. It provides me a beacon of light in a room full of darkness. Those stories are solid proof that you can find success in failures. Sometimes those twist of fate and failures can be a blessing in disguise. I guess a analogy that works for me is failures can be like cough medicine, hard to swallow but in the end it will only help you.

A little bit of inspiration for those who follow my blog...

This show was awesome

They don't make cartoons like this anymore.

Carpe Diem!

It has certainly been a long time since I wrote here, but I finally found some time to bust out a cup of tea and write amid the chaos that has been going on.

It's funny reading my last post on here. I was quite bitter and pretty pissed off and I will say that things haven't gotten any better, but I'm now learning how to get a hold of my life now and fix things.

First thing first, I finished all my application stuff!!!!! Woohoo! Although I barely made the GPA for most of the things that I applied for I was still lucky enough to able apply for them.Right now I'm going to test my luck and see if I can get the RA position, however, I don't think I performed as well as I could have for my personal interview but then again I always get really nervous and kind of awkward during interview scenarios. The interview for SPOP returner was really interesting this time around. I still felt like a newbie applying for SPOP when I walked into that room, but it helped me become more comfortable interviewing with people I knew this time around. Again I walked away from the interview amazed by their answers and I am hoping that they all get returner because in my opinion they deserve it. That interview made me miss being around the Gold year staffers this year. They were always so encouraging and just so...so inspirational. I learned so much from each and every staffer and every moment spent with them have helped me discover more and more about myself. I have said it time after time, but being a gold year SPOP staffer has been a huge blessing and an amazing experience.

Now onto my life...it's still not pretty. School is just becoming harder and harder by the second. Classes are getting harder to pay attention in, the coursework is harder, keeping up with the reading is becoming harder; life as a college student is just becoming hard in general. Hopefully that is going to change when I change majors because after last quarter I realized that I don't really like biology as much as I thought I did. I forced myself to like something that I really had little passion for and now I am suffering the consequences. This is one hard lesson I learned from this year, always pursue your passions. Forget all the "cons" of following that passion, if you really loved whatever you are pursuing you should only see the "pros." In fact, if it is truly your passion, you don't need to follow some sort of path to get there; you will find a way there. For me, I want to be a physical therapist but being a bio major is not the path I want to take to get there. I realized a year too late that I should have been in some other major than take the bio route to grad school. Yes being a bio major will help me because it opens up the doors for me but at same time, do I really love what I am studying? For me it's no, so why in the world am I in that major? I should of came into UCI as an Undeclared and keep my options open, instead I opted to be like all my friends and be a bio major. However, that's all "I should of..." instead of "What can I do now?" which is the attitude I should have. As Master Oogway so brilliantly put it, "The past is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why it is called a present." For a children movie, Kung Fu Panda has a lot of insightful and meaningful material and I highly recommend it.

As far as where I stand in my ministry, I still don't know where I belong. It's the worst feeling for me. I see so many familiar faces but at same time I don't really recognize them at all. It is becoming increasingly hard for me to connect with a lot of the people in the Edge. By myself, I am not a really good initiator (this is most likely reason why I don't have a girlfriend by now) and I guess that is something that you need to be able to do to establish strong relationships in the Edge. Whenever I go to the large meetings, I feel like a newcomer to the Edge instead as a member of the Edge for one year. It is just a weird feeling and I just don't feel as comfortable as I used to be. Even at the winter retreat I felt alone and by myself almost the entire time. Well, I guess it is partly my fault why I am a little detached from that group of friends yet something is just really bugging me about the Edge but I can't figure it out. Like I said earlier, the Edge is an amazing ministry that has all the potential in the world to something well beyond great. I don't know what is bugging me about it but I really hope I can find out what it is soon.

On the brighter note, I realized that a lot of the answers and miracles we ask and seek are right in front of us this entire time. We can be those answers and miracles we ask for. Everyone has the potential to be great, just some don't know it yet. It took me almost 19 years to realized that I can make a difference and I have the ability to do it. God provides us with the opportunities all the time, we are sometimes too blind to notice. We all are special and we all can contribute in ways that many others cannot. In Marianne Williamson's "Our Deepest Fear," she said that "Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you." We don't need to worry about what others think about us because in the end, that will only hinder us not help us. Once we overcome that feeling, who knows what we are capable of doing. The greatest leaders of all time were the ones not afraid to stand up from the crowd. They knew that a lot of the public will disagree with them but they did it anyways. They became the answers and miracles they were asking for. So I guess what I am trying to say here is seize the moment when the oppoturnity is presented.